My blog is a collection of answers people don’t want to hear to questions they didn’t ask.
― Sebastyne Young

 

Writing is not a hobby. It's the only way I get to shut up the demons in my head.
― Mark Maish

 

Prose is architecture, not interior decoration.
― Ernest Hemingway

 

Do not judge my story by the chapter you walked in on.
― Unknown

 

 

I don't exist.

I don't exist.

I don't exist. 

Yet I have a birth certificate 

A passport

A national insurance number 

 

But am I existing?

I'm on this planet by no choice of my own. 

Yet I have the choice to leave, I have the choice to stop existing entirely. 

 

Is this me speaking or my mental illness?

I'm not sure. 

But I am my mental illness right?

Well the thing is, I don't know, I don't know right from wrong when it comes to this. 

Twitter will tell me everyone is depressed and this is a phase. 

Facebook has the memes. 

Netflix glamourises suicide - will it be like that if I take my own life?

Can I leave 13 tapes and expect my suicide to become the central focus of people's lives?

Or will people just saying I'm doing this for attention?

 

Maybe I do want the attention...

 

I don't exist. I haven't for a long time. I follow the rules on twitter, to love myself, to drink 5 litres of water, you know, all that shit

 

But I'm still not here 

 

Am I my own death certificate? It's the only document I'm missing.

#JusticeForGrenfell

#JusticeForGrenfell

Sunshine and Raindrops.

Sunshine and Raindrops.